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Original Source:
Express 26 May 2007 [Now removed from internet] |
Saturday
May 26,2007
Geoff Marsh for express.co.uk |
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MADELEINE McCann's parents fought back
tears as they told how they felt guilt
that they weren't there when she was
abducted.
In their first interview Kate and Gerry
McCann spoke about the “darkness” they
felt in the first hours and days after
their daughter’s abduction.
The couple told how they had made
arrangements with other families to
regularly check on their children on the
night of May 3 while dining a short
distance away.
Gerry McCann compared eating in the
tapas bar at the Ocean Club Resort in
Praia da Luz as like “having dinner in
your garden”.
But he said: “I think it’s fair to say
that the guilt that we feel having not
been there at that moment, irrespective
of whether we had been in the next
bedroom or not, will never leave us.”
Still missing: Maddy
His wife Kate said: “Certainly the first
few days I think the guilt was very
difficult but I think as time goes on
you feel stronger and you feel very
supported.”
Mrs McCann insisted the couple were not
irresponsible parents but said they had
perhaps been naive.
She said: “I think we were naive, we are
very responsible parents, we love our
children very much. I don’t think any
parent could imagine or consider
anything like this happening.”
Mr McCann said the experience of his
daughter’s abduction was “worse than
your worst nightmare” but said that they
had drawn strength from thousands of
messages of support from around the
world.
They also described how they have been
dealing with Madeleine’s abduction in
the presence of their two-year-old twins
Sean and Amelie.
Mr McCann said: “We have said she’s gone
on a little trip just now and Amelie
came out with one really cutting line
that went right to the core, she said
’Madeleine’s on trip, back soon’.
“We certainly pray for that every day.”
Sitting side by side in an apartment in
the complex close to where Madeleine was
abducted Mr McCann smiled as he
described Madeleine’s personality saying
that she was a “ringleader” and had
enjoyed her holiday tiring her parents
out with a game in which she would shout
“Be a monster, be a monster”.
Mrs McCann said, smiling: “She likes
talking, she really likes role play.”
Mr McCann joined in saying: “She’s very
good at that actually for someone so
young, she really can talk...considering
that she was not even four.
“She likes activity and sport, she’s
very active, even at home when we are
going for a jog she says ’Can I come
jogging with you mummy’?”
The couple looked relaxed as they spoke
about Madeleine’s love of swimming,
going swimming on Saturdays and of her
favourite television programme - Dr Who
as well as films such as Shrek and
Finding Nemo.
Last picture: Maddy with her dad and
sister just hours before she vanished
But the couple said the three children
were very different, describing Sean as
“a thinker”, very methodical, fond of
arranging things in order, while his
twin sister Amelie is an extrovert.
But the family have been thrust into an
extraordinary situation over the past
three weeks since Madeleine’s abduction,
living in a holiday apartment with an
army of journalists and cameramen camped
outside.
Each morning as the couple take the
twins to the local kids club they pass
an array of photographers.
Mrs McCann said: “I think initially they
(the twins) didn’t really notice, Sean
in particular; Amelie has caught on, she
quite likes them.”
Everywhere they go there are pictures of
Madeleine appealing for information.
Mrs McCann said: “They just point and
say ’Madeleine’ and if they see us on
television they say ’mummy, daddy’, they
don’t really go on from there.”
Mr McCann added: “They know she’s not
here a lot of the time but we haven’t
avoided it, the last thing we would want
is for them to forget their big sister
and certainly we don’t want that, we’re
doing what we feel is natural with them.
“A child psychologist is coming out to
see us, probably next week, so that we
can discuss this in detail, at the
moment they are very happy, normal and
developing.
“They are turning from toddlers into a
little boy and girl.”
But Mr McCann insisted that he did not
feel that the twins’ development had
been affected by the extraordinary
ordeal of the past few weeks.
The couple spoke briefly about their
arrangements on the night that Madeleine
was abducted but said that they could
not go into too much detail because the
issue is relevant to the police
investigation.
Mr McCann said: “All the families were
checking on the children at very regular
intervals and often in very close
proximity.”
He added: “It is what we had done during
the week.
“There are one or two issues there...
there is a creche for example: we use a
routine at home and it works very, very
well for us and the key is that the kids
are asleep by 7.30 every night.
“As we had arranged to dine so close we
felt that it would have really disturbed
the kids dropping them off at a creche
at a time they were sound asleep and
then bringing them back.
“That was the reason why we didn’t use
that.
“In other Mark Warner resorts there is a
baby resting facility and this is the
first time we have been in a Mark Warner
facility.
“For us it was like dining in your
garden. Admittedly at the bottom of your
garden, but you could see the flat and
we were checking so regularly.
“Not for one minute would anyone have
thought that someone would abduct your
child, we were really going back to make
sure they weren’t crying.”
Asked about their emotions at the moment
that Mrs McCann went back to check on
the children and discovered Madeleine
had been abducted she remained silent.
But Mr McCann said: “There was the
darkest, deepest despair and it was
absolutely terrifying and when you go
back to it it still is.
“And we have had to put those dark hours
completely out of our minds. We channel
any negative emotions into the positive
emotion of someone walking in the door
with her or having the telephone call to
tell us that they have found her and she
is well.
“Until we know for certain that that
isn’t the case we believe that she is
out there and what we have got to do is
be in control of anything that may help
find her.”
Asked how they picture that moment there
was a long pause and Mrs McCann remained
silent.
Her husband eventually said: “You just
can’t put into words what that would
mean to us.” |
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